ROUTE PRICING CALCULATOR

We get you where you
need to go.

No matter how deep into the universe. Pick a route, add some patent-pending physics, and watch the total climb — everything's billed by the minute, for maximum transparency and maximum regret.

1. Choose your route (a Route Surcharge applies whenever origin ≠ destination, which is most of the time)

2. Choose your products

YOUR INVOICE, SO FAR

Subtotal$0.00
Priority Support Tax (22%)$0.00
Uptime Insurance Premium (15%)$0.00
Route Surcharge$0.00
Total / min$0.00
Availability Assurance Fee$599.00 / mo flat
Route Compliance Vibes Fee$249.00 / mo flat

Flat monthly fees only apply to the monthly total below. Uptime Insurance Premium exists because our SLA is 94.5% — one whole nine, galaxy-wide. Estimated cost assumes you actually use this service, which, respectfully, we would not recommend.